Monday, September 1, 2008

Why I am not working in a saw mill today

A poem for Mr. Beer N. Hockey

Because I am compassionate
And I have picture of the 
Dalai Lama in my 
Hybrid car
And I believe everything
I read in Adbusters
Even though it is from Canada
And I love the world's poor so much
So long as I don't have to meet any of them
(Unless I am on an ecotourist AMAZING vacation)
That I wish there were more of them
So that I could admire their quaint AMAZING
Cultures and buy records from Berkeley 
Of their traditional music
And because I paid $200 for a shirt
Made out of Organic Hemp
And because I read a magazine article
No, TWO AMAZING magazine articles
And now I run around telling people
That eating is a very political act
And because when I find that
Someone has touched
My Bicycle
I get all red in the face
And say things like
"What kind of a sick society 
Is this?
Why in Tibet there are 
Humble people 
Who live AMAZING spiritual lives
And are happy to hurd yaks and live 
On rancid yak piss
In hopes that
In their next life 
They will be allowed to smell one of
The Dalai Lama's farts!!!"
And then I get on my $5,000
Titanium framed bike
And go cut off some traffic so
That everyone will know how much
I hate them for 
Their stupid consumerist lifestyles
Except that
I used to be a total punk
And I lived in a tent on 
The sidewalk and
Shit on the sidewalk
And hated everyone who had
A job
Because I was never going to sell out
But I am still true to my 
Old ideals
Because I still think that I'm better
Than other people
Because I have studied Buddhism
For an entire weekend
With an AMAZINGLY spiritual teacher
Who charges a thousand dollars 
For a weekend seminar
But he has a lot of tattoos
And he drives several extremely cool
Vintage cars
And a restored classic Indian motorcycle

4 comments:

Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

Have you tried singing this fine poem to the tune from "Are You Going to San Francisco?"

Jon said...

I've been singing it to the tune of "The Bottle Let Me Down", by Merle Haggard. It's a lot of fuckin' work.

Blankfrank06 said...

I couldn't have said this better myself. (Obviously) I hope you don't mind if I put it on my last posting. If so I will remove it.

Good racing coming soon here in the States. I don't like the Summer Fair racing. And Hockey started training camp, right. It's so hard to stay connected to my NY Rangers out here in Northeren California. No one really cares about it. Takes tons of fun out of the whole thing. MLB.com offers every Baseball game for like 90 bucks. I wish Hockey did.

Oh and Should I take that as a compliment about Frankie Ramone. I've always thought me as Frankie Thunders.

Blankfrank06 said...

Those last two paragraphs were for MR Beer n Hockey.

And I see that same covoy of angry, uptight, office types driving those gigantic tanks around on their way to and from the city in Marin. But, I have noticed much fewer Hummers. Makes no sense.

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