Joel might be the last bad ass bus driver on the West Coast. The rest of us have gone over to the unicorns, crystals and health food side.

People ask me about my job. They say, "I bet you've got some stories to tell, eh?"

Yeah, well, so does everybody else.

My job is mostly about knowing how to survive in a bureaucracy- like the military, or prison. You have to know who to watch and who to ignore. You have to know when to speak up and when to shut up. You have to know what you can get away with and what will get you in trouble. Beyond that, most of it is optional. You can make friends or be a loner. You can gossip or mind your own business. You can stick with your own race or make friends outside of it.

The part where you drive buses is kind of a lonesome thing that you do on your own. I try to avoid that part. It can drive you nuts. It took me many years, but the passengers really don't bother me anymore. Now it's the traffic that I hate. When the passengers were driving me nuts, I didn't have time to worry about the traffic. Other than that, I spend a lot of time wondering when I'll get a chance to piss. A lot of passengers tell me I'm good at my job. I hope I'm good at something.

As of this week, I've had my job for twenty one years. That seems like it might be too long. I'm pretty glad I've got it. I'd probably just sit home by myself if I didn't have a job.

This little routine is pretty close to what my job is like. I was surprised.

Bus Driver- The Whitest Kids U' Know(buy)